Crying Baby – What if your baby keeps crying?

How nice that you're reading along again. With my blogs, I aim to support parents in parenting and raising their children. Parenthood is beautiful, but sometimes also intense and overwhelming. You are allowed to enjoy it — especially on the difficult days. Try not to see challenges as problems, but as a natural part of parenthood. Enjoy reading!

What is a crying baby?

Some babies cry more than average — sometimes for hours at a time, for days on end, or even for weeks. When a baby cries excessively and is difficult to soothe, they are often referred to as a "crying baby."

On average, 1 in 15 babies is a crying baby. These babies often react strongly to stimuli such as light and sound, are restless, and are difficult to calm. The crying sometimes seems to start without a clear reason — and is just as hard to stop.

What does this mean for you as a parent?

A crying baby doesn't just cause distress for your child; it can also be incredibly hard on you as a parent. You do your very best, but your baby keeps crying. You may feel powerless, exhausted, and perhaps even frustrated or guilty.

Know that you are not alone. These feelings are normal, and many parents go through this.

💡 Important: no matter what happens, never shake your baby! A baby has weak neck muscles and a relatively heavy head. Shaking can cause severe brain damage — with permanent consequences or even death.

Is there always a cause?

In most cases, there is no medical reason for excessive crying. Still, it remains important to consult your family doctor or child health clinic if you have doubts — especially if your baby drinks poorly, gains little weight, or shows other unusual behavior.

What can you do?

There is no miracle cure for crying, but there are ways to make the situation more manageable — for your baby and for yourself.

1. Structure and repetition
Create a recognizable daily routine. This doesn't have to be strictly by the clock, but it should follow a predictable order (e.g., feeding – cuddling – sleeping). Repetition gives your baby a sense of security.

2. Communicate lovingly
Make eye contact, speak softly to your baby, and reassure them. Your voice and closeness are important.

Also be open about your own emotions: if you feel sad and share that, it can create a sense of connection — sometimes crying together is even a relief.

3. Physical calming techniques
Baby massage — such as Shantala massage — can have a relaxing effect.
Swaddling gives some babies a feeling of safety, helping them sleep better.
Carry your baby in a wrap or carrier. The closeness and movement help your baby calm down.
(See also my blog on "Baby Massage and Swaddling".)

4. Give yourself a breather
It is not a weakness to step away for a moment. Ask someone you trust — such as a grandparent, family member, or friend — to take care of your baby for a night.

Sometimes a new environment also helps your baby calm down. This does not mean you are failing as a parent; it means you are taking good care of yourself and your child.

My own experience

I still remember how my eldest son cried inconsolably when I wanted to stop breastfeeding. He wouldn't accept the bottle, and I felt powerless. I wanted so badly to help him and felt like I was failing.

What ultimately helped me was acknowledging that I didn't have to do it alone. Taking time for myself, asking for support, and listening to my intuition — that made all the difference. Every baby is different, and what works for one may not work for another. Keep searching for what suits your child.

It will get better

Most crying babies become calmer after about three months. They learn other ways to express themselves, and their digestive system is more developed by then — which often reduces the crying.

Finally

Do you have a crying baby? Then know this: you are doing a good job. Even when it feels like you're falling short — your love, care, and presence make all the difference.

Perhaps it helps to feel recognized and to know that you're not alone to read the following book:

Thank you for reading this blog. If you have any experiences or would like to share something, feel free to tell us below.

Take good care of yourself — and in doing so, of your little one as well. Until next time!

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